The Anti-Networking Trick That Builds Real Influence

⏳ Read Time: Less than 4 min.

👋 Welcome Back, Edge Seekers!

I’m excited you’re here for another edition of The Winning Edge! Each week, we explore game-changing tools and tactics to sharpen your competitive edge.

This week, I’ve got something counterintuitive for you…

If the word “networking” makes you picture awkward small talk, LinkedIn cold DMs, or cheesy events with soggy name tags—you’re not alone. But what if the best networkers don’t network at all?

Let’s flip the script.

Instead of collecting contacts, we’ll explore The Anti-Networking Strategy—a method that helps you build deep influence without "networking" at all. Plus, I’ve included a few other fast wins to help you upgrade your relational game today.
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This Week’s Insights

✅✅ The “Anti-Networking” Strategy That Turns Strangers Into Allies
✅ Quick Connection Hack – A one-liner that builds instant rapport
✅ The Rule of Recurrence – How frequency beats brilliance in relationships
✅ AI Tool of the Week – Turn meeting notes into relationship builders
✅ Power Relationships – How to become someone people recommend

THE MAIN EVENT
🎤 The Anti-Networking Strategy That Turns Strangers Into Allies

Here’s the truth no one tells you:

So instead of trying to be interesting, try being interested.

Welcome to:

🧠 The “Mentor Mind Trick”

Instead of focusing on your pitch, your story, your achievements… ask people what they’re learning right now. And here’s the twist:
🧲 Frame yourself as a curious learner, not a clever expert.

Ask This:

This one question:

• Breaks the small talk script

• Engages people’s favorite topic (themselves)

• Reveals shared values and philosophies

• Creates the conditions for mutual elevation, not transactional exchange

🎯 Follow-Up Power Move: After the convo, message them something like:

Now you're not a connection. You're a meaningful moment in their mind.

QUICK HITTERS: Fast Wins for the Week

💡 Tip of the Week: In follow-ups, reference something specific they said. It shows attention, not automation.

📊 Stat of the Week: Relationships built around shared learning are 74% more likely to result in collaboration or opportunity within 6 months. (Source: Harvard Business Review)

🎭 Power Move: Send a short Loom video instead of a thank-you email after a coffee chat. It's personal, unexpected, and unforgettable.

📖 Recommended Read: "Superconnector" by Scott Gerber & Ryan Paugh — It’s not about collecting contacts, but creating value-driven relationships.

WEEKLY DEEP DIVE
The Rule of Recurrence – How frequency beats brilliance in relationships

Let’s talk about a powerful idea that separates people who collect contacts from those who build meaningful influence:

📈 The Rule of Recurrence

People often think relationships are built in the big moments—a coffee chat, a handshake, a great intro at an event.
But real influence is built in the in-between.

It’s the quiet, consistent touchpoints that build trust equity over time.

🧩 The 3-Part Recurrence Framework

Here’s a simple method to build deeper relationships without being “that person” who constantly pitches or pings:

1️⃣ Show Up Thoughtfully

Don’t just follow up when you need something.
Instead, ask:
👉 “What’s one small thing I can send or say that’s relevant and helpful to them?”

Examples:

• A podcast clip on a topic they mentioned

• A client or job lead

• A kind comment on their latest post

• A simple, “This reminded me of our conversation…”

These small touches create “micro moments of trust.”

2️⃣ Add Value in Public

Not all relationships are built 1-on-1. Sometimes, people grow to respect and remember you because of what you share publicly.

✅ Comment on their content in a way that adds perspective
✅ Share something they’ve created with your network
✅ Tag them in a post that aligns with their work

This helps you stay top-of-mind without feeling transactional.

3️⃣ Create a Low-Lift, High-Value Habit

Build a system for recurring touchpoints without overthinking.

🧠 Try the “5x5x5 Rule” once a week:

• 5 minutes

• 5 people

• 5 thoughtful check-ins or shares

Send a voice note. DM a “just thinking of you” message. Introduce two people who should know each other. The content doesn’t matter as much as the consistency and intent.

🎯 Final Thought

We often chase the new connection, but real career-changing relationships come from nurturing the ones you’ve already made.

📬 Don't underestimate what a single message—sent at the right time—can do. You might become someone’s catalyst, connector, or confidant.

AI TIP OF THE WEEK

📌 Tool: Clay.earth – The Personal CRM for Relationship-Driven People

What it does:
✅ Automatically syncs with your calendar, email, and LinkedIn
✅ Reminds you when it’s time to reconnect
✅ Helps you remember key details and past convos

🔗 Try it at clay.earth

🧠 Why it matters: Relationships are capital. Clay helps you manage that capital with class.

WINNING WITH AI: The Future of Sales Proposals and Presentations

AI isn’t just for tech geeks or big corporations—it’s transforming how we sell, present, and communicate. The best sales teams are already using AI to:
✅ Generate compelling, tailored proposals in minutes (not hours).
✅ Turn data into engaging, visual stories that capture attention.
✅ Automate tedious tasks so they can focus on closing deals instead.

This isn’t the future—it’s happening right now.

Get your copy of my ebook here!

ACTION STEPS & COMMUNITY QUESTION

✅ This week, try the Mentor Mind Trick in a conversation. Ask someone what they’ve learned recently that’s shifted their thinking.

Then follow up. Mention the lesson. Watch what happens.

🗣 Question: What’s your go-to move for making memorable connections? Hit reply—I’d love to include some community favorites in an upcoming edition!

P.S.
Next week, we’re diving into Presentation Mastery—specifically, a mind trick used by top TED speakers that makes your audience lean in, listen harder, and actually remember what you said. Hint: It’s not about slides—it’s about surprise.

Keep building your edge—one conversation at a time.

YOUR OPINION MATTERS!

If you have more feedback or just want to get in touch, respond to this email, and we’ll get back to you!

Thanks for reading!

Until next week!

Mary Beth