Why "Looking the Part" is Overrated (and what to focus on instead)

⏳ Read Time: Less than 4 min.

I’m super excited to welcome you back to another edition of The Winning Edge. Each week, we break down game-changing tools and tactics to sharpen your competitive edge.

Ever been told to “look the part” to have executive presence?
What if I told you that might be the least important piece of the puzzle?
This week, we’re flipping the script on executive presence—and giving you the REAL tools that command the room (hint: it’s not just your outfit or posture).
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This Week’s Insights

✅ Why “Looking the Part” is Overrated (and what to focus on instead)
✅ The Subtle Verbal Cue That Subconsciously Builds Authority
✅ Why Being Too Polished Can Hurt Your Credibility
✅ AI Tool of the Week – An app that gives you executive-level voice coaching in real time
✅ Executive Presence – A twist on how to own the room without faking it

THE MAIN EVENT
🎤 The Myth of “Looking the Part”

Let’s get this out of the way: dressing well helps.
But executive presence isn’t about your clothes—it’s about your clarity.

🧠 The Real Drivers of Executive Presence:

1️⃣ Certainty Over Style: People follow those who speak with conviction, even when they’re casual. You don’t need a blazer—you need a bold, well-structured idea.

2️⃣ Unapologetic Pauses: Want to instantly elevate your authority? Pause intentionally. Most people rush to fill silence. Executives don’t.

3️⃣ Micro-Mirroring: Subtly mimic the tone or posture of your listener—without being obvious. It builds subconscious connection and signals emotional intelligence (EQ > IQ in the boardroom).

4️⃣ Purposeful Imperfection: Here’s a curveball: being too perfect actually creates distance. A slight stammer, a dry joke, a moment of vulnerability makes you more real—and more relatable.

QUICK HITTERS: Fast Wins for the Week

💡 Tip of the Week: Want to sound more senior? Replace filler words with silence. Ditch the “uh,” “like,” or “you know.” A beat of silence feels more powerful.

📊 Stat of the Week: According to a Harvard study, non-verbal delivery accounts for 63% of perceived executive presence—but clarity of thought is the #1 driver of trust.

🎭 Power Move: Next time you're asked a question, pause for two full seconds before answering. It signals confidence and thoughtful control—especially in high-stakes meetings.

📖 Recommended Read: "Compelling People" by John Neffinger & Matthew Kohut — a masterclass in balancing warmth and strength (the two true pillars of executive presence).

WEEKLY DEEP DIVE
Executive Presence: Flip the Script on Traditional advice

Executive presence is often mischaracterized as charisma in a power suit. But true presence has less to do with image—and everything to do with impact.

If you want to own the room without faking it, start mastering these three high-leverage areas:

🔄 1. Flip the Script on Traditional Advice

Old Rule: Dress the part, speak with authority, and maintain eye contact.
New Rule: Deliver insight with emotional precision.

People don’t remember the most polished speaker—they remember the one who spoke directly to their fears, hopes, or blind spots.

Instead of asking, “How do I look confident?” ask:

✅ “What problem am I solving for this audience?”
✅ “What emotional state do I want to leave them in?”

The real magic of executive presence comes from knowing what your message does to the mindset of the room.

🧠 2. Information Density > Talking More

Executive communication is less about how much you say, and more about how much meaning you pack into your message.

🔍 Example:
Instead of saying, “We need to align our priorities to meet the Q4 goals,”
Say:
🎯 “Three priorities. Four months. One shot at momentum.”

You just reframed the conversation from strategy into urgency, without using a single buzzword.

High-level communicators speak in clean, memorable frames that stick in people’s minds—like taglines for big ideas.

🌀 3. Strategic Intuition: Speak in Principles, Not Points

Top leaders rarely “wing it”—but they also don’t regurgitate bullets.
They think in models, principles, and cause-effect logic.

That’s why when they speak, it feels like they’re giving you a compass, not a to-do list.

✅ Try this: Instead of listing your ideas, say:
“Here’s the principle I always use when X happens...”
or
“There’s a pattern I’ve noticed in situations like this…”

This elevates you from “one of the team” to someone who sees around corners.

🧊 Bonus: The Hidden Power of Controlled Vulnerability

You don’t need to “overshare” to show relatability. Just a single line like:

…can buy you instant credibility because it shows that your insights are earned, not theoretical.

🎯 TL;DR: Executive Presence =

→ Speak with insight, not just authority
→ Deliver ideas with structure and emotional weight
→ Show human edges while holding your ground

You don’t need to “perform leadership.”
You just need to communicate like someone who’s already leading.

AI TIP OF THE WEEK

📌 Tool: Training for Trust (by Team Lewis)

Forget standard speech coaches—this is next‑level. Training for Trust is a brand-new biometric‑AI system that analyzes your facial expressions, voice patterns, and eye contact to assess and enhance qualities like trustworthiness, composure, and authenticity. It’s the first of its kind to offer objective, real-time feedback on integrity—not just delivery. You see how you're actually perceived, not just how you sound.

Why this matters now:

• Breaks the subjective bubble: Most executive coaching relies on perception. This tool brings data into the mix, contrasting overconfidence or self-doubt with real behavioral feedback.

• Tailored calibration: Whether you’re a founder pitching investors, a CEO commanding a board, or a political candidate navigating optics, it helps dial in just the right blend of authority and warmth.

• Built for leaders: Already tested across the UK, US, and Malaysia, with ambitions for a global rollout—it's not consumer-grade fluff.

WINNING WITH AI: The Future of Sales Proposals and Presentations

AI isn’t just for tech geeks or big corporations—it’s transforming how we sell, present, and communicate. The best sales teams are already using AI to:
✅ Generate compelling, tailored proposals in minutes (not hours).
✅ Turn data into engaging, visual stories that capture attention.
✅ Automate tedious tasks so they can focus on closing deals instead.

This isn’t the future—it’s happening right now.

Get your copy of my ebook here!

ACTION STEPS & COMMUNITY QUESTION

🎯 This week’s challenge:
✅ Reach out to someone you haven’t connected with in 30+ days.
✅ Be specific. Be helpful. Don’t ask for anything.

Then hit reply and tell me: What changed when you reactivated a dormant connection?

P.S.
Next week’s edition will show you how to build authentic relationships without schmoozing. Spoiler: The strongest networkers don’t “work the room”—they work the follow-up.

Keep building your edge—one conversation at a time.

YOUR OPINION MATTERS!

If you have more feedback or just want to get in touch, respond to this email, and we’ll get back to you!

Thanks for reading!

Until next week!

Mary Beth